The best lawyer story ...

The United Way Charity realized that it had never received

a donation from the city's most successful lawyer. So a United

Way volunteer paid the lawyer a visit in his lavish office.


The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, 'Our research

shows that even though your annual income is over two million

dollars, you don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like

to give something back to your community through the United

Way ?'

The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, 'First, did your

research also show you that my mother is dying after a long,

painful illness and she has huge medical bills that are far

beyond her ability to pay?'

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbles, 'Uh . . . no,

I didn't know that.'

'Secondly,' says the lawyer, 'did it show that my brother,

a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair

and is unable to support his wife and six children?'

The stricken United Way rep begins to stammer an

apology, but is cut off again.

'Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's

husband died in dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless

with a mortgage and three children, one of whom is disabled

and another that has learning disabilities requiring an array

of private tutors?'

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, says,

'I'm so sorry, I had no idea.'

And the lawyer says, 'So . . . if I didn't give any  money

to them, what makes you think I'd give any to you?

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